Together but separate

The King of Cups and I aren’t always on the best of terms.

In tarot there are some cards I really resonate with. I smile when they turn up in a reading - nodding to them as I would an old friend. There are other cards, like this one that I struggle more to connect with.

I feel as though they have something to tell me but they aren’t always getting the message across. Something gets lost in translation.

But today, for the first time I had a bit of an aha moment with the King of Cups - in this deck by the Spacious Tarot the King is renamed as the Elder of the suit.

For many years I prided myself on being a scientist. It was my career, my profession and in many ways my whole personality. I was all about the logic - thoughts and feelings didn’t get much of a look in.

All of that changed when I changed career and I struggled a bit with making my way in the world without my scientific shield in front of me. Acknowledging that my emotions are valid has been something of a work in progress and for the first time today I caught glimpses of what this card has been trying to tell me.

Yes, at times I can feel uncomfortable acknowledging the depths of my own feelings but I’m getting better at it. My challenge now is to navigate the feelings of others as well and to perceive them as separate to my own.

Seeing this beautiful fish surrounded by the tranquil (but deep) water made me think of an analogy between this and social media. It is one thing to be in control of your feelings and emotions, to feel calm and secure and grounded. It is quite another to do that when you are surrounded by a sea of other peoples emotions.

It goes a long way towards explaining how sometimes social media can feel overwhelming for me especially on days when there seems to be a lot of news or online chatter.

More importantly, it reminded me that the only person I can be in control of in such situations is me - my thoughts, my emotions and how I represent those in the online space.

I am not responsible for how those words land with others - their emotions are their own to control (or not).

Aha - thank you my fishy friend. I think we had a bit of a breakthrough today 🐟